My goal with Agave is simple, to help you plan the life you were designed to live. I believe we all have a purpose, a unique impact we are meant to have to leave this world a little bit better than it was before we entered it. But there are so many things that get in the way of us discovering and living our purpose. Maybe it is fear, or insecurity. Maybe you don’t believe you are good enough, qualified enough, talented enough… just not enough in general. Maybe you have no idea where to even start, you don’t know what you are good at, or how you could make a difference in anything. Maybe life is just too busy with work, and kids, and diapers, and dinner… you barely survive each day and have no time to think about something as elusive as a larger purpose. Maybe you are crippled with grief, loss, or trauma and struggle to believe that there is purpose in life at all.
I have been there and felt each of those things, and that is exactly why I started Agave. I have always been a big dreamer and an obsessive planner. I set ambitious goals for myself, and through hard work and planning, I have usually been able to accomplish what I set out to do. One could call me a control freak or a perfectionist (enneagram 1 anyone?), but for most of my life, this need to plan and control served me well. In early 2017, I was pregnant with my second child. I was 16 weeks along and we had just found out that the baby was a boy. I had an almost 2-year-old at the time, and we were so excited for him to have a brother. Then, on January 10, 2017 – we lost our precious Owen. Miscarriage was not a part of my plan. Sometimes in life, we have these moments that we know are going to change us forever. Change our worldview, our identity, the way we move through life – change absolutely everything. When I was in the midst of losing Owen, I knew that this was one of those moments. I wanted to just hit pause, to stop, to not enter into this new life of grief and loss and pain. I didn’t want to lose the illusion I had of control over my life, I didn’t want to lose a baby. But life doesn’t work that way, we do not have control, we cannot stop bad things from happening.
While we were freshly grieving the loss of Owen, God gave me a beautiful symbol of hope. The agave. Agaves are what is called a century plant, they bloom once in their life and then die. But death is only the beginning for the Agave. In dying, they leave behind hundreds of little baby plants that continue to grow and thrive. Agaves are a beautiful symbol of God’s promise to bring life out of death. In my grief, I clung to the symbol of the agave. I chose to believe that through the pain, God would bring something beautiful out of my life. 1 Peter 5: 10 says “And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.” I learned through this time of darkness that life is not just about the growth, the flowers, the achievement. Sometimes, life is about pain, sadness, and hardship. We need to go to the depths of death to experience the height of life. We can find purpose, even in the midst of great pain – in fact, I believe that pain is often the path to purpose.
So, I developed a system to help me to focus on life through the lessons of the agave. This daily ritual cuts through the daily struggle of grief, fear, uncertainty, and business to claim intention that builds towards a larger goal and purpose. When I was in the thick of grief, this saved my life. It helped me find joy in the midst of sadness, gave me permission to grieve, and allowed me to find purpose in each day. Now, I have come to see it as a powerful tool in helping me live an intentional life. Accomplishing big goals and achieving big dreams is not going to be all rainbows and butterflies. It is going to be hard work. Life is going to get in the way. It may be the daily challenge of keeping your children alive, or it may be something horribly tragic. Life is really hard. But when you practice gratitude, acknowledge the struggle, and choose intentional growth, you will make progress and be able to plan the life you are designed to live.